Has anyone managed to stop the guilt?
Somebody supporting another with alcohol addiction
After many years and promises to stop drinking my son said at the weekend he had stopped, was looking for work and in a better headspace.
He ask us for 2k as he would lose his flat 1 September if we did not pay his rent . After discussing with my husband we decided we would if he agreed to engage in AA ( not just go to tick a box) as he has done in the past . Also he needed to connect with a mental health charity that was recommended to him to months ago . He agreed to it all as he wanted to change his life.
I had strange messages from him yesterday only to find he was drunk!!!
Please help if anyone has made their child homeless through no fault of yours but their own doing .
My gut feeling is if he can afford to drink he can afford his rent. But as a mum It feels really cruel….
He ask us for 2k as he would lose his flat 1 September if we did not pay his rent . After discussing with my husband we decided we would if he agreed to engage in AA ( not just go to tick a box) as he has done in the past . Also he needed to connect with a mental health charity that was recommended to him to months ago . He agreed to it all as he wanted to change his life.
I had strange messages from him yesterday only to find he was drunk!!!
Please help if anyone has made their child homeless through no fault of yours but their own doing .
My gut feeling is if he can afford to drink he can afford his rent. But as a mum It feels really cruel….
2 reactions
11 replies
Somebody supporting another with alcohol and cocaine addictions
Sadly we have been in a situation in 2024 where we were left with no other option but to ask our son (then 22y) to leave the family house 😢 . It was the toughest thing ever and I don’t think I could make that decision again, but hopefully we won’t have to (he is now maintaining recovery and back home, reunited with his whole family, working and benefitting from ADHD medication after being diagnosed earlier this year).
Happy to connect if you wanted to chat x
Happy to connect if you wanted to chat x
Somebody supporting another with alcohol addiction
Thank you so much would like to . Not sure how to connect I think you request?
Somebody supporting another with alcohol and cocaine addictions
Ill send a request to connect x
Somebody supporting another with alcohol addiction
Hi, I can really understand why you feel guilty but you are not making him homeless...he is responsible for that.
We have helped my son with money and paying bonds etc lots of times. We have decided not to do this again, hoping that it will make him eventually take responsibility for himself?
I too would feel very guilty in this situation , being mums our instinct is to protect and save them always, but maybe it doesn't really help them ?
We have helped my son with money and paying bonds etc lots of times. We have decided not to do this again, hoping that it will make him eventually take responsibility for himself?
I too would feel very guilty in this situation , being mums our instinct is to protect and save them always, but maybe it doesn't really help them ?
Somebody supporting another with alcohol addiction
Sometimes helping them (or we think we are) is not helping them at all. They are extremely manipulative and controlling and use emotional blackmail. He needs to hit rock bottom to hopefully make him change. God it’s hard but that’s what you have to do 🙏🏼🙏🏼
Somebody supporting another with alcohol and gambling addictions
It feels bloody awful but we can't enable ..but its so hard..I know that I will have to face the possibility that my Son will make himself homeless..the thought of having him back here makes me feel ill..ypu aren't cruel..xx
Somebody supporting another with alcohol addiction
Thank so it so nice to know it’s not just me !! It’s really strange we don’t know each other but all the stories have the same thread. 💕
Somebody supporting another with cocaine addiction
I with the help of my older son asked my younger son with a cocaine addiction to leave my house after the financial and emotional abuse had me on my knees shaking, he did leave knowing that he was in the wrong, he ended up staying with friends for 2weeks getting agency work and is now doing a training course to work on the boats, sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind, I feel relief that he no longer lives here and now he is actually getting his life together, keep strong, don’t give him any more money, let him work out what he wants from life on his own 2 feet, he might do better than you think x
Somebody supporting another with alcohol addiction
Thank you for your support Rosa. It’s a really hard corner to be in but we have had enough this time . Years of promises and verbal abuse has just taken its toll on me . So enough is enough . .
I hope your son manages to turn his life around. 💕
I hope your son manages to turn his life around. 💕
Somebody supporting another with cocaine addiction
Thank you ☺️ you have to look after yourself now, you have done your best for long enough, it really is up to your son what he wants from life, take a step back and start to rebuild your life, you are not alone, wishing you well 💗
Somebody supporting another with alcohol addiction
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