Approaching
Somebody supporting another with cocaine addiction
Tonight I tried to approach them, to help them on their journey to wanting to do it alone but with support. They were interested, they picked me up from work to talk about it but the conversation drifted to how I knew they were active on substances at the weekend. When I chose to lot disclose how I knew, they put their pedal to the floor, angry. They drove and threatened to kill themselves, kill someone. They scared me. We almost went into the back of a car and I screamed for them to stop, to slow down. They didn't listen. When I shut up and cried silently in the corner of the vehicle they looked at me. They said "you're scared. Good you should be". They pulled up at my house, took out the puppy food we had gone to get and then said "get out". I got out, I went to my front door and I fell into my mum's arms crying. How much of this is the disease? How much of it is really them? How much of this can we both recover from?
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Somebody supporting another with alcohol and cocaine addictions
I think a lot of it is the addiction talking. The real person is under there somewhere.
I can only speak from our own experience but after around 3-4years of failed attempts at recovery, the biggest change came after what we hope/pray was our loved ones rock bottom (lost license and homeless for a few months) and in recent months they have been saying I am done with this, I want a normal life. Family bridges are now being rebuilt, slowly - Ive learned recovery has bumps along the way & we are still learning.
I did find the Forward Trust very helpful for my own support & mental health. Im not sure where you are based but an organisation like that may be something you could try - for you. (They are the commissioned service in our local area and they have programmes to help families of loved ones affected. They do have an online chat service which is what I used initially to make contact).
I can only speak from our own experience but after around 3-4years of failed attempts at recovery, the biggest change came after what we hope/pray was our loved ones rock bottom (lost license and homeless for a few months) and in recent months they have been saying I am done with this, I want a normal life. Family bridges are now being rebuilt, slowly - Ive learned recovery has bumps along the way & we are still learning.
I did find the Forward Trust very helpful for my own support & mental health. Im not sure where you are based but an organisation like that may be something you could try - for you. (They are the commissioned service in our local area and they have programmes to help families of loved ones affected. They do have an online chat service which is what I used initially to make contact).